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Ugh, FINE, your anonymous pleading has gotten to me. I made the pseudonym so my parents wouldn't freak out about identity-revelations on the interwebs.

All I have to do now is deduce your identity; you're someone who hasn't yet asked me about the name until now, meaing I must have met you fairly recently. And you seem to enjoy brackets in your smilies.

I am the worst detective.

Ask me anything